Saturday, August 30, 2008

Two Presidents. Two Futures. One Cup . . . of Post-Apocalyptic Whoop-ass.

There are two (2) new end-times video games coming out for Ye Xboxe 360e in the next few months that each offer a unique look at two laugh-a-minute, exploding-head-filled futures. And I've managed to link them to the upcoming Presidential election because I am good at stretching.

Fallout 3 (Oct. 24), which takes place in a blasted wasteland formerly known as "U.S.A." after El Uno Grande, should be considered mandatory playing (or training, even) in the event that Senator "Nuke" McCain ascends to the throne and enacts "Fissile Diplomacy." In this sequel to the legendary Fallout series of PC RPGs, you play a gritty loner with a penchant for blasting people's limbs off who needs to save his in-bred fallout shelter from some crisis.

Left 4 Dead (Nov. 18), which makes you just one pretty petal of a beautiful multi-cultural and -sexual rainbow flower of heavily armed regular folks who must work together, in cap-busting harmony, to pump mountains of lead into the armies of zombies who would very much like to eat your hippocampus. This is, of course, what will happen if Senator "Stem Cell" Obama's twisted "secular humanist scientists" are allowed to "learn" and "try" scary new ideas. Like "curing shit."

Both should give us plenty of time to prepare for the two unique horrific end times each administration will bring. Enjoy.

Here's a nice bit from Fallout 3 (bust a cap in some irradiated raider scum to classic R&B!).

And here's how things roll in Left 4 Dead, after the zombies come to town (also smart tunes here: delight in the awesome stock horror/Goblin-sounding music!)

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